People Aren't Always What They Seem

Here goes my first recorded example of a "do-gooder". I will probably first write about some of the things I remember that have happened in the past because, if I've remembered them this long, they deserve to be permanent. A few years back on a summer day I was driving my kids to a park. The park was downtown, significantly distanced from my home. I suddenly felt an imbalance in my car, and suspected it was a flat tire. I'm proud of myself that I didn't panic. I was, after all, in an unfamiliar area with two small children and I had no idea what to do except pull into a parking lot and call my husband. He was unfortunately unavailable, preoccupied with supporting the family and all. He would have come if he were able to, but he was nowhere near my location that day. I remember wondering what certain individuals do who have no one to call and no experience changing a tire! Well, this is what they do. They call roadside assistance. Or, if they're lucky, someone will have pity and come help them. Such was the case with me. A man, probably in his fifties, approached me and asked if he could help. He had a long ponytail down his back. My first impulse was to not trust him and say that my husband was on his way. Now, before I say another word, I suppose I have to state the obvious. Here's the obvious. Women need to trust their instincts and protect themselves. Don't pull over in a seculded area, especially in the dark. Be aware of your surroundings and whats going on around you, be smart. Pay attention to what your gut is telling you. My impulse to misjudge this man was not my gut instinct, it was stereotyping. I would have been just fine if I had stayed in the car and called for roadside assistance. But I decided to go with my gut and let this man help me. I was so grateful. He explained what he was doing as he was doing it, and even encouraged me to crank the jack so I could get a feel for it. During the process, he talked to me about his girlfriend. After several minutes of hearing about her, it became obvious that this "girlfriend" was his wife. He explained that he calls her his girlfriend, and treats her like his girlfriend, in order to preserve a loving marriage of thirty years. It must have worked. Thirty years speaks for itself. So this is what I learned that day: There are good people around who look out for each other. I learned how to change a tire. Don't think the worst of somebody just because of a long ponytail. Kids are very well behaved when they sense something out of the ordinary happening. Take care of my marriage.

I don't remember his name, but I remember what he did and how he made me feel. Thank you, mister.

Explanation

I am always touched when I hear stories of courage and compassion, stories of regular people reaching out to connect with a human being in some way, stories of heroes past or present who look outward beyond themselves and leave a legacy of good behind them, instilling a flicker of hope in discouraged hearts. Stories of regular people who help make our world a better one to live in. When I hear of these stories, big or small,  I am changed for a moment, I am determined to be a better citizen under whatever hats I wear. It lasts for an hour, maybe a day or two. Then, inevitably, the emotion is dimmed until it's almost forgotten, and I go on living my life sometimes forgetting how much the human race needs each other. Why are those moments of realized purpose so short lived? In speaking for myself, why do I forget so easily? That's why it means so much to me to hear of people breaking that wall down for a moment, no matter how brief. These stories encourage me to keep trying to look outward and remember a little longer. They remind me how much potential we have for good to lift another person. These stories remind me that it doesn't always take a lot of effort to encourage someone to believe in the goodness of others, or not to give in to despair, perhaps even steering them away from a path that could have devastating results. And sometimes these stories do come at a great effort and unimaginable sacrifice on the part of the giver. Whether large or small, acts of choosing good or inspiring another person add up little by little, until, over time, the capacity for maintaining and strengthening a society for the better is enormous. We have the power in our hands as individuals to determine, by the choices we make in regards to others and our basic tendency toward right or wrong, the kind of society we live in. The things we do affect the nature of our society, which affect ALL of us.

My main goal is to use this blog as a tool to help me pay more attention to the goodness around me, helping me to in turn remember to reach out to others. I hope this blog inspires others as well. I can attest that when I DO look outward, I am certainly more happy and content in my life, than when I am just thinking about myself. We make life count for something more than just mundane surviving when we look outward.  I am excited to take notice of acts of service and moments of human connection and then write about them, and include stories in history that have meant a lot to me.  Actually, I haven't been this excited about something in a long time!